Evelyn and Raya
It’s been a long while since I spoke of Evelyn’s imaginary friends. Bella has been showing up from time to time but fairies, as you know, tend to make brief entrances.
There’s been a new friend lately. Her name is Raya and she is the same size as Evelyn.
Raya appeared at bath time a few months ago. Evelyn wanted her tiny Bella around but Bella’s size and delicate wings kept her out of rough and tumble play. Raya is the same size and age as Evelyn. She rides behind Evelyn on her tricycle and takes “tubbies”with her. Of course, Raya is the messy one and usually creates the splashes that go over the edge.
The names of Evelyn’s friends came from her. What, or who, inspired them is as mysterious as where they came from. Evelyn is posing (above) while hugging Raya.
There was one startling bit of news about Bella last week. Evelyn claims that she has lost her wings. Although she seems to have retained her 2” height, one ponders if she may be evolving in some way?
I’ll be following these three closely and add updates. 🙂
Evelyn’s relationship with her imaginary fairy friend, Bella, hasn’t evolved as quickly as I had expected. Big sister, Katherine, had a cast of characters by this stage in her imaginary friend days. Bella seems to like working alone.
She’s ever present though. Evelyn has a loosely closed fist almost constantly. Once in awhile, I’ll ask her what is in her hand only to hear, “Oh Grandma, you know it’s Bella.”
Even when she doesn’t see me watching, Evelyn places Bella on the table in order to use both hands. Just last week, she was asked to play football on the sidelines of Katherine’s softball practice. As she raced by her mother with the football tucked under one arm, she hollered to her Mom, “Catch Mommy! Please hold Bella.” Then she waved her hand in the air tossing the fairy not the ball.
On one occasion, Evelyn held both fists in the air announcing that one held Bella, and the other, Baby Bella. She was Bella’s new ( even smaller!) baby sister. I haven’t heard from her, or “seen” her lately.
Out of the blue, when Bella gets into a high flying routine, Evelyn invites me to watch. Sometimes the fairy takes on a superhero role and becomes, Super Bella! It’s quite awe inspiring and I am reminded to clap for her, if I forget.
Yes, she is able to “leap tall buildings in a single bound” and, according to Evelyn, her goal is to save people from falling. I’m thinking she’s very effective. I haven’t seen a single person fall from the sky on Bella’s watch.
The “Bella Experience” has been so dramatically different from Katherine’s Zabby Eight. I have no idea what twists will happen next. You’ll certainly be kept in the loop.
It’s been a while since my last update, but it is still clear that Bella is ever-present in Evelyn’s daily life.
When I attempt to hand things to Evelyn, or ask her to take my hand, she pauses to place Bella somewhere safe. Yesterday, I unfolded her sweaty little hand to relieve her of Bella so she was able to grab the slide with both hands for climbing.
(There they are in the photo above! I asked Evie to hold Bella out for a photo.)
What is especially cool is the fact that Bella is a fairy. Her size, and wings, make her adventures so different from Katherine’s imaginary friends. I think Bella’s “stature challenges” will be very useful to Evelyn as she, herself, is on the tiny side. And, of course, Bella is almost useless when it comes to picking up toys which keeps Evelyn on clean-up duty alone. HA!
We’ve started noticing that Bella engages in many of the naughty things that Evelyn does. She and Evelyn have each engaged in writing on themselves with pens and locking doors.
Yes, fairies have pens but they are “really tiny ones”. As each day starts anew, I’m happy to announce that Evelyn and Bella took a tubby last night and came in all clean and shiny this morning. We’ll see if the talk I had with them did any good.
One thing that Evelyn’s imaginary friend can do, that Katherine’s never could, is ride on the bubbles that we blow and swiftly flutter to safety when the crowd gets too rowdy. Oh the places we may go!
Another interesting difference is that Bella has no pets, family, or friends. Katherine’s, Zabby Eight, had a multitude of new characters almost daily!
Bella and Evelyn are going to Myrtle Beach next week and, soon after, they’ll be coming to camp. As fairies are very discreet, I’ll have to listen extra well to find out more. I promise that this is going to be fun!
Evelyn is continuing to bring her imaginary, fairy-like friend, Bella to day care.
I want to take this opportunity to add that imaginary friends have been discriminated against for years. When Evelyn’s sister started with them (7 years ago), most of the expert opinion literature was divided about their worthiness to be encouraged. Encouraging them once they appear of their own accord, I might add. I was extremely careful not to be involved in their creation. This was handled well by only asking questions.
We (My daughter, Ellen, and I) had a blast with older sister Katherine’s friends. It was a delightful experience from which I vowed never to deem imaginary friends unworthy again.
(In fact, as an advocate, I’m waiting for just the right moment to suggest that imaginary friends might want to consider unionizing.)
The biggest benefit became clear when I was able to discuss manners and safety by including the imaginary friend. Children under 5 or 6 simply do not know what truth is, and so, when Katherine began blaming her friend, Zabby, for some of the rule infractions, I took advantage of that chance to address my displeasure. I sternly told Zabby what would happen if she OR Katherine did those things again. After all, taking responsibility for one’s actions is a very difficult, mature concept. Many of our adult public servants haven’t even learned that lesson… a small child is simply unarmed. Later on, taking responsibility was also discussed with the imaginary friend. In fact, we approached many topics from the shared responsibility Katherine and I developed in raising Zabby to be a good citizen.
Bella has already been helpful. Evelyn and I have been “showing her the ropes” for day care. We’ve told her about the danger of opening doors without permission and to watch for babies’ fingers when we close them too. Evelyn and I thought of one specific safety issue which only applies to Bella. When she flutters around on her fairy wings, we warned her not to go near Pepe’ who might mistake her for a pesky fly and swat her!
I still find myself carrying Bella in my own cupped hand longer than I need to. Ha! And you thought Bella was not real. I certainly believe.
Yesterday, Evelyn was dismayed that Bella wouldn’t take a cracker. When I asked about the size of Bella and the size of the cracker, Evelyn drew her own conclusion about the cracker being too heavy. And late yesterday afternoon, Evelyn took a “tubby” in my sink at the same time as Bella was safely in her own small Tupperware tubby.
Evelyn even treated me to a lesson in “How to kiss a fairy.” before her Mom went to work. (Incidentally, Ellen was in tears suppressing laughter during my instruction.). Every time I puckered and gently kissed the palm of my hand, it was incorrect. Then Evelyn adjusted her lips (looked like she was chewing gum) then gently brushed her lips across her own palm. I just didn’t measure up in fairy kissing all day.
I’m going to practice today…wish me luck.
It is going to be somewhat difficult to add photos to the Pa-Pa-Pa Bella posts. I’m not new to imaginary friend blogging and already know they are especially hard to pin down for photo shoots.
Today, Evelyn convinced me that Bella is here to stay. I caught her talking into the palm of her hand several times. On one occasion, I heard her sighing, “Awwww.” and kissing her hand.
Her manner was so genuine that it touched my heart.
Around noon, she walked up to me and gently slid her hand into mine asking me to watch Bella. With a cupped hand, I left the room to make lunch and this is when the phone rang. Just so you know how completely I had bought into Bella’s presence, I actually turned and put her on my kitchen table before answering. Ha! Yes, that is the absolute truth.
Later on, when Ellen showed up at day’s end, Evelyn cupped her hand and told her mother to hold Bella. Ellen was gathering boots and bags and told Evelyn she was going to let Bella ride on her head so her hands would be free. Evelyn agreed.
Moments later, Evelyn shouted, “Mommy! Your glasses are in the way…I can’t see Bella. ” (Ellen wears sunglasses on her head.)
Ellen assured her, “She’s there.”
Evelyn, not convinced, pursued her to the door on tiptoes trying to see the top of Ellen’s head.
I spoke up, “I see her! She’s on Mommy’s ponytail.”
Relieved, Evelyn grabbed her blanket and said, “Yeah…there she is. Okay, let’s go.”
It’s official. Pa-Pa-Pa Bella arrived at day care this morning. Evelyn walked in with Bella in her cupped hand.
According to reliable sources, Bella went to bed with Evelyn dressed in an orange t-shirt and a diaper. But, when they got up, they were dressed in identical sleepers.
Evelyn introduced Bella with her full name, Pa-Pa-Pa Bella, and placed her delicately in my hand.
The photo above was a capture of their first hot dog lunch. (Bella’s on the right.) Upon asking Evelyn how they enjoyed their lunch, Evelyn said,” She didn’t eat her’s lunch up.”
We talked about it some more and agreed that Bella’s tiny bites and teeny tummy were the problem.
Happily Evelyn discovered that they enjoy the same morning programs.
As I write, they are watching Tree-Fu-Tom and, of course, Bella’s love of trees was brought up too.
Just yesterday, I announced that I was “divorcing” Facebook. The experience had drained me and had dragged me into a defensive role which was changing me.
Whether you believe in divine intervention or the “closing of a door, opens a window” principle, something remarkable happened moments ago. In my Sillyfrog’s Blog, I had documented my oldest granddaughter’s imaginary friend. This was a very happy and funny experience. Ellen (my daughter and mother of my two granddaughters) just called to announce 2 1/2 year old Evelyn has an imaginary friend. We’d been watching for this.
I’d like to introduce, Evelyn’s friend,Pa-Pa-Pa Bella. Here’s Ellen’s description:
Bella (for short) fits in the palm of Evelyn’s hand. She has wings and lives in a tree. She’s a lot like Tinkerbell but, according to Evelyn, not exactly like her.
Bella’s favorite food is hot dogs and Ellen was busy setting a place for Bella at the lunch table when we concluded our phone call. The lunchtime menu is hot dogs!
I asked Evelyn over the phone, if Bella will be coming to day care.
“No, she stay at us house.” was her answer.
I said, “So I’ll meet Bella at your house?”
“I don’t know.” said Evelyn.
This grandma is hoping Bella comes to my house! I’ll be careful not to lead the imaginary friend experience but will keep an anxious “ear” on Evelyn for updates.
Here we go!
This is going to be FUN!
Here’s a link to big sister, Katherine’s, imaginary friends experience: